I have come across an American website, well more of a forum for 'moms' in which a woman had posted asking what officer's wives are and aren't supposed to do and who and who not they are not supposed to be friends with and there is quite a lengthly debate going on! I get the gist that I did in the book (A Private Affair) that there is a lot of snobbery and rules or being 'frowned upon' involving friendships of army wives. In the book,I really believed it must have been exaggerated but it appears that that is the case! A lot of the women are saying that if they develop friendships with wives whose husbands have a lower ranking than their own husbands; it can get their husbands into trouble, as if he was to be seen having a friendship or liason with someone of a lower rank, favourtism and 'privileges' can come into play. Other women, perhaps ones with a stronger character, disagree and say "we don't work for the army, I'll be friends with who I want!". In any case, I still get a strong feeling of loneliness from all parties, often mentioned were the many months when their husbands have been deployed elsewhere.
There is definitely a common theme of a hierarchy going on in each base, it feels oddly like an american high-school movie... All these little 'base-worlds'; each with their 'top-dogs'.
http://www.circleofmoms.com/military-spouses-with-children/so-question-for-officers-wives-463684
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